Thursday, December 31, 2009

"Can I have A2 on my steak?"

There was much excitement at our house tonight. It was grocery store day so there were lots of yummy foods being unloaded today. Among those goodies was a pack of steaks. We don't eat steak very often at the Hawkins home. There are a few reasons why. One because it costs so much to buy a good ribeye and it "has" to be a ribeye (medium rare). Two, because my boys love steak, thus the first reason all over again, it takes a lot to feed those 4 little mouths. Also, and this might be a little TMI, but we can never find dental floss when we need it and you have to have dental floss after having a good ribeye. Our dental floss seems to always be used to make traps rather than to remove trapped food from your teeth. Anyway, we did have steak tonight. The Meat Store had a special 5 ribeye steaks for $20. We couldn't resist. I was doctoring up the potatoes while Matt was cutting up the steak for the boys. I must confess to you that I have a real problem with ketchup or ranch on a steak (yuck). To quote a dear friend..."That poor cow ain't never done nothing to deserve that." But my children insist on dipping their steak in something so I asked the usual steak dinner question..."Joshua, would you like A1 with your steak?" "No Mommy, but can I have A2?" I laughed that really deep, raspy, belly laugh. (A2?) What made him ask that? Why not A1? What's wrong with A1? Nothing, he just liked his idea better. After all A2 is original. No one else has A2. Then it dawned on me. I do this to God all the time. I want what He is not offering. I want something else. I want something that doesn't exist in my life. I want something new. I can never be satisfied with what sits on the plate in front of me. For goodness sake, I have steak with A1, but nooo I want A2. Now, I really don't think Joshua was being discontent or ungrateful. I think he was innocently asking, but my asking is not always so innocent. I have my dream husband, I have 4 incredible children, I drive my favorite van, I have my Macbook...I could go on and on with the blessings He has poured out on me, but guess what? I still want A2. Well, maybe not A2, but a digital cannon rebel, a new flatscreen TV for my bedroom, a hot tub (hey, a girl can dream)... Don't judge me, you know you have your list too. The truth is, I don't want to have a list. I am very content with my life. I LOVE my life. I have so much more than I could ever imagine, but I confess there are days I get caught in the trap. The trap of not being content to eat the steak, but wanting the A2 to go with it. Wanting something that is out of my reach, something that is not in God's plan for me. Why is this? Because I allow myself to take my focus off the one who died for me and blesses me beyond my imagination and I turn my focus to the electronics isle at Target. I focus on what the Jones's have and wonder why I don't have it. I am content. My heart is content and blessed beyond measure. I face a choice each day. I can receive my steak dinner with a heart of thankfulness, contentment and overwhelming gratitude or I can make my A2 list. I choose to savor and enjoy each bite. I need nothing else. All I need is Him. Thank you Joshua for encouraging me to adjust my focus and have a content heart.

Philippians 4:12 NIV
I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.

Hebrews 13:5 NIV
Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.”

1 Timothy 6:8 NIV
But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that.

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