Monday, August 30, 2010

"In My Weakness..."

Just as the band plays "that old familiar song" I too am singing a song today that I'm sure you have heard me sing before. Once again I have decided to "deny myself" by giving up something. This time Matt and I are doing it together. Two weeks ago God began to stir within our hearts that we needed to really seek His face concerning an upcoming event within our church. The last time this event was before us God called us to 40 days of corporate prayer as a church body. This time Matt and I felt that God was asking us to step it up a notch and give not only of our time, but to sacrifice in a way that required more from our flesh. He has called us to do the Daniel Fast for 40 days as we pray and prepare for this event. Before you begin to pat us on the back, make wagers as to if we can complete this or start condemning us for openly discussing this "fast" when the Bible says not to advertise it, let me share a few things with you. For us this is not so much a fast as it is bringing our bodies under the control of the Holy Spirit and learning to honor God with what we put in our mouth. Now, don't think for a minute that a medium rare ribeye properly seasoned cannot honor God if prepared properly and eaten in moderation, but for a time Matt and I have felt led to limit what we partake of. For the record I would also like for it to be known that this is ALL God and none of me because you don't get to be this curvy just eating fruits and vegetables, 'so obviously' this was not my idea. Today is day 12 and already I have had 2 days of total and complete weakness. I have even threatened to cancel the upcoming event if it means I can't have a Coke. But guess what, "In our weakness, He is strong." Even though my heart and flesh may fail and I desire to partake of the worldly fare, my Heavenly Father has been my strength and allowed me to stand steadfast in my commitment to Him. I am finding once again that the greatest lessons are not always learned in the answer, but in the wait that comes before. It seems that many times in my life God has placed me in the "Wait." We often see those times of "wait" as a punishment, a cruel joke or wasted time, but in reality the "wait" can be the greatest lesson of them all. I can think back on many times of waiting. I waited for God to bring me a mate, all the while He was preparing me and Matt for that destiny. Oh, how thankful I am for those days of waiting that brought us both to His feet and allowed us to first love Him intimately. I waited and waited to become pregnant, learning more lessons during that wait than I could have thought possible only to be blessed with 4 precious boys. Sometime layering the "waits" God was teaching me multiple lessons as over the years I have awaited test results from Cat-scans, MRI's Blood tests, Biopsies, not only on me but sometimes my husband and once my small child. Thinking that God would receive the greatest glory when the answers came and then realizing that the greatest lessons came in the time He called me to wait because sometimes the answers did not seem so great. We miss so many teachable moments by worrying away the days of waiting, when God desires for us to embrace the wait and sit at His feet. He is always teaching us. I believe that sometimes He allows the wait to remain until we become pliable and learn the lesson He had planned out for us. So today, once again I find myself in the wait. I am excited to see what God is going to do through our upcoming event, but I am even more excited to learn from Him each day as I rely on His strength. That is where I am today. I am weak, but He is strong. I want a coke, but because of His strength I am drinking water. My prayer this morning was "God show me your lesson plan for today. I don't want to miss anything you have for me." I don't want to check the "days of duty" off and miss the abundant blessings of obedience as I wait on Him. What is your wait today? Has God called you to a new discipline in your life? Are you waiting on a mate? Do you long to hold a child in your arms? Are you awaiting test results from your doctor? Maybe it is a financial need that you are trusting God to take care of? Whatever the weakness, allow Him to be your strength. Whatever the "wait," ask Him to teach you, mold you , shape you and allow you to remain until His will has been accomplished in your life. Sometimes the "wait" can be the most precious time you ever spend. "In our weakness, He is strong."

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