My parents have been married for 40 years. Not just married, but happily, totally in love married for 40 years. Growing up I never really gave much thought as to why. Why?...because that's just how married couple are. I lived in a world that ALL marriages were that happy, that loving and that Godly. I entered my marriage with those same expectations and I am overjoyed to report that for the most part it has been abundantly more than I could ask or imagine. What I have learned is that it takes work. I never really saw my parents work on it. I just thought that was the way it was. What I now know is that they worked on it and they worked hard, but the natural overflow with which they worked made it appear so easy, that it was just part of life. Tonight I was having dinner with my parents and I noticed something was written on their cantaloupe in the fruit bowl of the breakfast nook. I looked closely and in a handwriting that will forever be engraved in my memory I saw these three words I LOVE YOU and a heart with an arrow. I quickly realized what Daddy had done. He left this message on the cantaloupe for mother to find in the morning. As strange as it may seem, having a message written in fruit did not seem odd to me. We grew up with messages written in lipstick on the mirror, dry erase markers on the windshields, notes in Bibles or briefcases, notes taped to the door or steering wheel, notes written on lunchbox napkins and messages written in the fog on the mirror after a hot shower. We have even returned home to find stuffed animals holding notes that "they" wrote stating.."Monica, you might want to clean your room. Your mom is starting to get upset. Love, Teddy" They have been doing this for each other for as long as I can remember. Growing up my brother and I even grabbed hold of this love language and began to leave notes for them and for each other. I once intercepted the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition and cut out clothes from the JCPenny's catalog and glued them on all the girls and left my brother a sweet note about how much I cared about him and wanted to protect him from temptation. I'm sure he appreciated it, even though he would never have admitted it as he peeled each outfit off to find that the glue has ruined the magazine. OOPS!! Anyway, what was actually working on marriage for my parents became just a part of who we were as a family. They found a love language they could speak and one that was received. Now don't get me wrong, they did other things too, like serving each other, planning sweet dates and trips, they communicated well and they made their relationship a priority among all the other demands that pulled at them. I can say I have been blessed to have such a Godly example of a marriage that brought Him glory and honor. The good news for all of us is that we can have that same marriage. We can have a marriage that after 40 years can still get giddy and creatively sneaky to write a love note on a cantaloupe. Marriage is work no matter your status. 2,4,10,25,40 years, it does not matter, marriage is work. Marriage is daily dying to self and asking God how we can minister to our spouse. Be creative!! Think outside of the box. Let them know you care. What Does Your Cantaloupe Say?
- Hebrews 3:13 NIV
But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called Today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin's deceitfulness.
- Hebrews 10:25 NIV
Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another--and all the more as you see the Day approaching
Monica, I could totally picture Ronnie writing this on the melon. I love your parents. My Ronnie and I also are coming up on number 40 in April. I have wonderful memories of our early marriage years together with your folks. Many blessings to you and to them!
ReplyDeleteDebbie.
Never thought of writing it on a melon! Thanks for inspiring ideas on how to remind my family how much I love them. Especially since we have just had Valentines! We celebrate with a family "Love Feast" giving small gifts and writing letters to each other. My children keep all the letters written and exchanged, then reread them during the year. Now I have a few new ideas.
ReplyDeleteMichelle du Toit
Hi Monica! Honestly, I'm not sure what portal brought me to your blog, but I'm happy to be here. I LOVE the idea of cantaloupe notes in all the forms you describe. Thanks for sharing - you brought a smile tonight (especially with the SI Swimsuit story!!!)
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