Thursday, July 26, 2012

When fear creeps in...

Writing and blogging are definitely on my list of loves, but in recent months that plate quit spinning and fell to the ground while I have frantically tried to keep the rest spinning. Exercising is actually the plate that is spinning out of control and I have lost 40lbs and have become an avid runner. Last night I decided I would run to Matt's office which is just over 1.5 miles away. I set out with the intention of a mild run and decided to turn left instead of right which meant 1.5 turned into 3.8 and light turned to dark before I reached Matt's office. I was faced with a choice. I could take the high traffic road with cars and homes and people or I could take the road less traveled and continue my peaceful run. As my feet pounded against the dirt and the sun set before me I was more than happy with my plan. About 1/2 mile down the dirt road I realized that darkness was approaching fast and would arrive before I reached my destination. I started getting nervous and running faster. My cell phone went dead and it dawned on me that no one knew my route. FEAR overtook my thoughts. I knew where I was going and I knew how to get there, but fear of the unknowns along the way took the joy out of my run. Does this sound familiar? Can you relate? Do you know where you are going? Do you know how to get there? Do the fears and unknowns of this life ever rob you of your joy in the race? With joy gone and 1/2 mile left to run I decided I needed protection. I found a large stick (well maybe it was a limb) on the edge of the road. It was very much like a double edged sword. It was a large limb in the shape of a Y and it took both hands to carry it. At this point I was no longer running towards my destination, I was walking slowly, cautiously and my focus was on my surroundings, NOT on my destination. The sword brought a sense of safety but still uncertain as to what I would do with it if danger approached, I needed more. I began to sing and sing loud. Caleb said "Mom, I can see you walking with a big stick and singing 'I will sing of my redeemer, lift my voice to praise the Lord..." I love that he knows me so well. That is exactly what I was singing. I had my "sword" and His words of praise were on my lips and then I saw the light. I recognized the lamp light that is stationed right outside of Matt's office. When I saw the light my fears were lifted. GONE. I knew my destination was close. I could run again. I held on to my sword and I continued to sing and my joy returned. So what happened? The same thing that happens in our spiritual lives every day. We know our destination and we know how to get there. HE has given us His word as our sword and the guaranteed Holy Spirit within us to be our song and our source of joy and conviction, but unknowns creep in causing us to take our eyes off of the prize. We become distracted and are robbed of the joy of walking with Him daily. Too often we wait until we are afraid, worried or overwhelmed to pick up our sword or to worship Him. Keeping our eyes on Him, staying in His word and living our lives in praise to Him as we worship in spirit and in truth will keep the joy alive as we run this race. Perseverance in the key. Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run(A) with perseverance(B) the race marked out for us,fixing our eyes on Jesus,(C) the pioneer(D) and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross,(E) scorning its shame,(F) and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.(G) Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary(H) and lose heart. Hebrew 12:1-3